October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month and it is promising to be a very helpful in providing a better understanding of Domestic Violence at Arizona Western College. Some activities that are being planned are a round table question and answer forum on the 13th . Also, there will be an open mike night where anyone can stand up and share their story in an effort to gain strength and healing from one another.

AWC/ NAU-Yuma Violence Prevention Program is raising awareness by also bringing to the community the theatrical production, CONTROL.ASSAULT.DELETE, written by John King and directed by David Barker. The performance will take place on Saturday, October 16 at 5:00-6:30 pm at the Arizona Western College Theatre.

CONTROL.ASSAULT.DELETE is a one-act dramatic performance depicting a typical young woman as she enters college with high hopes and plans to fulfill her dreams and then meets her abuser who controls her life and ultimately ends all hopes of her ever achieving those dreams. This presentation will touch your heart as you see the things this young woman experiences in her quest to find happiness, save the man she believes loves her and finally, as she frantically seeks to save her own life.

The purpose of this work is to:
(1) Point out common mistakes made by parents and friends in their frustrated attempts to help the victim escape the abuse.
(2) Bring to light common tactics used by abusers to trap victims into a rigidly controlled relationship.
(3) Point out to abusers the pain and misery they bring to the lives of others through their actions.

Also being planned are weekly Art Healing Workshops called "A Window Between Worlds" and a ëWalk a Mile in your Shoes" where men on campus will be asked to wear ladies shoes and walk to support the cause.

If Domestic Violence feels a little too close to home for you, you are NOT alone. One out of four women is a victim of domestic violence (DV) every year. Yes, men are abused, too. But, statistics show that 85% of DV victims are women, so the victims are usually referred to as women. In the AWC/NAU Violence Prevention Program (VPP) there are both men and women who have stepped forward and try to change their lives and the lives of others for the better.

Many victims have children that they don't want growing up fatherless. Racine Amos, the director of the AWC VPP, often asks these worried mothers, "Do you want your daughter to marry someone like your husband or boyfriend?" Once the women realize they don't want that, Racine and her crew begins the process to provide safety, support and assistance for them to leave. It is left to the victim whether or not charges are pressed against the abuser.

Domestic Violence is defined as a pattern of behavior that includes the use of threat of violence and intimidation for the purpose of gaining power and control over another person. This includes physical, verbal, sexual, emotional and even spiritual abuse, isolation, and control. DV is not limited to just marital relations. According to Arizona law it includes former marriages, living together, having children together, if either the victim or offender is pregnant, parent/child or grandparent/grandchild by birth, adoption, step, half, or in-law. It can be same sex relations, made worse for those who are afraid their sexual orientation will be revealed if they tell anyone. Assault even occurs online. DV affects every country, culture, class, education, income, ethnicity and age.

Dating Violence also occurs when one person in a relationship uses similar means to gain power and keep control over the other person. The U.S. Department of Justice found that women ages 16-24 are the most likely victims of intimate partner violence with 21% of college students reporting they have experienced dating violence by a current partner. Thus, the importance of having this program available on our campus today.

The Violence Prevention Program provides help and guidance to those affected by violent attacks. It is difficult to leave an abusive relationship for many reasons that outsiders often do not understand. Often times the victims fear for their lives if they leave or they don't have money. Some may feel so isolated and alone with their problem that they don't see any way out. These people do not realize that help is only a phone call away.

THE VPP teach the warning signs of an abusive relationship and provide awareness of the cycle of DV that entraps so many women.

Here is a graph of the Cycle of Abuse that couples get caught up in.

Julio Martinez is the President of the Peers Educate Anti-Violence in Community Everyday (PEACE) Club. Many of the advocates for the program were victims of violent attacks themselves and now speak out against violence through the PEACE Club. They have found the fold of VPP to be a safe haven that accepts and embraces them and meet regularly to learn and teach how to make better choices. Many people who escape violent relationships become painfully aware that the very characteristics that attracted them to the first abuser are the same characteristics that attract them to their next relationship and suddenly find themselves, to their horror, caught up in another violent relationship. That is one reason why counseling is highly recommended for both the abuser and the victim. Counseling helps teach pattern behaviors that people learn, either as children or from other traumatic experiences, which causes them to abuse others or tolerate abuse. There have also been many cases of the abused becoming the abuser. Young boys who witness DV and/or were abused themselves are twice as likely to become abusers as adults. Counseling also helps victims to learn boundary setting and how to interpret threatening signals.

The aim of the program is to educate and promote awareness of dating and domestic violence, sexual assault and stalking. They host workshops, educational presentations, and special awareness events. The VPP also sponsors a "No Classes Cancelled" program now for AWC and NAU Yuma faculty. They provide presentations during times when the professors can't make it to class. They have a 95% disclosure rate after their presentations which attest to the success of the program.

The VPP also teach others in bystander intervention with a specific goal to hopefully cultivate a cultural shift toward peaceful resolution rather than violence. An example is of a couple fighting in public with no one responding to the outburst. Racine said, "Often times if the man is approached in a non-threatening manner he will back off. But, if no one wants to risk getting in the middle of the fight, someone should at least call the police. DV is not about just one person, it is about everyone.

Future events will also be taking place during the Stalking Awareness Month in January, Dating Violence Awareness Month in February and Sexual Assault Awareness in April.

If you or someone you know is a victim of domestic or dating violence, or you would like more information, you can contact the VPP in the CTE office or call (928) 317-6170. They can assist you with safety planning, community resources and support.

Love should never hurt. Ever.